♥Wednesday, July 29, 2009
안녕하세요! HELLO! :D
Sorry for not posting for sat , sunday , monday and tuesday, didn't get a chance to use computer as both of my brothers were using it.. so i didn't get to use it.. shall not post them as most of them, i've forgotten what to post..and as for the photos i said the previous post, i will not post them as i've forgotten what to post too.. sorry..
Today, school was boring.. and didn't talk much today too.. during lit, keep disiao yunlong.. though he's abit sick.. sorry arh.. he keep talk back to me and i felt iritating.. before english, he wanted to pass something to Joyce and he hold on to his water bottle and without knowing , he poured out all his water on the table and he throw his water bottle towards shunzi.. lol.. poor thing~ mr daniel came in and he saw the mess behind me and he say " Xinyi, you should know what to do" and i look back to the floor.. i told him is not i make one.. and said is yunlong's.. During Lit, tried to take revenge as yunlong was so iritating.. but he's sick.. poured some water on his table when i get very fed up.. btw sorry arh~
After school, went to eat prata with xinyun before going to training at NY. We reached there and NO VOLLEYBALLERS CAME YET.. nanyang's CO was in the hall practicing for their competition tomorrow.. and i found the song and the conductor familiar and found out that its Our school's CO de conductor.. called cheryl they all to confirm..LOl.. after training, bused home instead of walk home.. Once i reach home i bathed.. i bathe until 9+ and came out thinking still 8+.. ate my dinner and was freaking full.. went back to my room and think alot of things and i cried..
I think i'm going to be emo again.. I have no mood to talk or laugh in class and i don't know why.. My neck is freaking pain and i feel like chopping my head off.. Same for my back... Everyday when i come home, i just feel like sleeping like there's no tomorrow..went to training today and felt sad and jealous.. when i see the other players playing so good and me, so noob... i feel so useless.. Xinyun's receiving and spiking are getting better and better.. but mine, still suck as before.. when i see mr woo and jiaolian say she receive good balls and encourage her to do more push ups, i felt freaking sad, i feel that i was a burdened when it comes to games as i can't receive well.. I want to help to gain points but yet i'm causing the rest to lose points.. i felt myself being useless, hopeless, stupid... i began to hate myself more and more..
In class i've become more quiet and quiet.. i just simply have nothing to say in class.. when i feel like talking, nobody talks to me.. but when i want to be quiet , people say i emo.. When i'm at home, i talk to my mum, she didn't even care to reply me or she didn't hear it..i must call her until alot of times then she reply.. now i finally know how it feels when you're being ignored by someone..
Sorry sarah, xiaopin and ahbell as i ignored your quite alot of times..
I felt so tired...
Feel Like sleeping like there's no tomorrow..
I hate myself...
today's post shall stop here...
안녕히 계세요! (goodbye!)
I blogged@: 10:29 PM
